At the Microphone

Day two of class introduced us to a wide variety of terms, working relationships, and tour and travel companies. Finally, in the afternoon, we started to examine the specifics of guiding. Our first assignment wasn't really routing a tour, as it seemed to suggest on the itinerary, but merely mapping it on illegible maps. It seemed an out-of-date assignment with the technology we have at our finger tips, so I just pulled out my iPhone, clicked on my Google maps app, and attempted, with magnifying glass in hand, to map out the route we were given. I would imagine any good tour guide will have the tools she needs at hand.

It seems that one of the benefits of investing in a course like ITMI, in addition to the knowledge we gain and the contacts we make, are the resources that it offers. Graduates can log on to the website and download city sightseeing. DC is excluded, since like New Orleans, New York, and Charleston, one needs a license to guide; therefore, any ITMI graduate who is a tour director will either be turning the tour over to a licensed city guide or will be one herself. What I can and will do when I get home is to contact a licensed DC guide from ITMI and get some help preparing for the license. In order to get a license in DC, you pay a $150 fee, submit six character references and a physical conducted by a DC doctor, and score at least a 75% on a multiple-choice test. At least for now, I had the Los Angeles route and description in hand.

Each of us were given a particular site on the tour with a few minutes to prepare. After a brief practice, where we all talked at the same time, we gave a solo one-minute introduction. I was surprised that a few people dreaded this; I understand some anxiety and hesitancy, but why would you take such a course if you were afraid of public speaking? In the end, everyone had a good sense of humor. In the begining of the course I didn't believe that there might be some people who might be asked to seek some other means of improvement before continuing to week two, but after this exercise, I can see why ITMI "invites" you to continue to week two.

Day three was our first day on the motor coach. I learned that we don't call them buses: they are coaches or motor coaches. I learned how and when to count everyone. I learned how to hold the mike to my face and how to balance myself in the chair. We also were warned that, despite what we might think about the safety of the bus at 10 miles an hour, that it is the most dangerous speed for the tour guide; if that coach has to stop short the guide can go out the glass window. That is something I will remember. I learned that it is the responsibility of the director to be sure the driver has the route and to let him know when we are ready to go. And, we were off.

The morning was a great deal of fun. All we had to do was play tourist. After a freeway ride with typical LA traffic, we finally made it to downtown. Our first stop was the Disney Concert Hall, designed by Frank Gehry -- truly magnificent. It's always important to plan for a rest stop, so at the next stop -- Olvera Street, the site where the original 11 families settled LA -- the first thing that was pointed out were the bathrooms. On any coach trip I have been on, we have always been told that the bathroom on the bus is for emergencies only. A quick tour of the oldest exisiting house was followed by a delicious churro from Mr. Churro (I followed the tour guide into the place, a good lesson for knowing where to go) before hitting the primary purpose of the stop -- bathrooms.

Our next stop was the famous Grumann and Kodak Theaters before our drive down Sunset Boulevard, Santa Monica, Rodeo Drive, and Wilshire. It strikes me that these streets are all familiar to me even though the last (and only) time I was in LA was on my honeymoon almost 35 years ago. The film and TV industry have made these streets household names. Lunch was at the Farmer's Market, and now people were starting to think about what came next. It was going to be our turn at the mike after lunch. Each of us would have to go to the front of the coach to demonstrate proper mike control and safety, while talking about we had just only learned that morning. Now I was anxious as well.

We went up and down the coach starting on the driver's side. I learned "driver's side" and "door side" was less confusing than "left" or "right"; using the clock is even better: for example, "you will see the Hollywood sign coming up at 2:00." Since I was on the door side in the front, this meant that I wouldn't be speaking until the end. This was good. Some people were naturals. Nancy is engaging. Derek has a voice I can listen to all day. Gary is funny. Others weren't quite as natural. If we were passing sites, we had to talk about them; if there was nothing to see, we had to do "fillers." By this time I had to go to the bathroom so badly that I thought I wouldn't be able to say anything because all I could think about was that I needed to pee. Then I lucked out. We had missed the Cathedral of the Lady of Angels in the morning because we ran out of time; just as the person before me was about to go up to the mike, our tour guide announced we were at the cathedral, and we would continue after our visit.

Not only did this give me the opportunity to go to the bathroom, but it also gave me time to think about what I could possibly say. It was obvious by now that we were going to be on the freeway for my turn. God bless Kevin. He told me to look for the Alverada Street exit; that is where MacArthur Park was -- the song by Donna Sumner. I decided to talk about watching out for motorcycles (they are allowed to drive on the line) and see where the coach took me. Motorcyles and MacArthur Park impressed our tour director who was giving us feedback on how we did, so much so that she pointed it out. The tour guide is the eyes for the people. Watch the signs. Read the signs. And don't say "um."